What do you prioritise in life? Have you ever sat down and tried to write the five things that matter most to you; the ones that, when push comes to shove, you stick to?
We are often taught to prioritise work tasks into urgent, important, routine and unnecessary, but we are not taught how to do the same in our personal lives, or even that this might be important.
Even if we know what is important to us and for us, that doesn’t mean we are always good at remembering to prioritise them. We often take a short-term attitude and think that it doesn’t matter if we only miss out on them for a short while. This is fine if the challenge is short term, but has a detrimental impact if the challenge is going to last a long time, or indeed of we get out of a habit.
We tend to think of priorities as things like work, exercise or life chores. But I would suggest to you that it is more useful to think of them as themes or attributes or states of mind or emotion.
Here are some themes in life that you might like to consider prioritising for your wellbeing…
Peace
This is a very general word and may mean different things to different people. For me, I would suggest prioritising peace over being right. This applies to arguments, conflict and tension and is not to say you shouldn’t state your point of view, or go along with what someone else is saying jut so you have an “easy life”.
Rather, work out what is worth fighting about and what is not. If you have found yourself embroiled in arguments with friends or family or work colleagues, ask yourself three questions – is it important in the grand scheme of things, can you agree to disagree, and how would you feel if you just accepted the situation as it is? To have peace of mind and live drama free is massive.
Living
By this I don’t mean being alive, but rather living a life that is aligned with who you are, what you enjoy and your values, and living in the present moment as much as you are able. Living means experiencing and noticing the things that are around you right now, not thinking about the past, or fast-forwarding into the future. Are you getting up and trying to find the life within each day that is around you in nature, in interactions with others, in bringing meaning to everything you do? Just try it for one hour or so and you’ll be surprised by how you feel. Don’t let life become a list of things to do or grey, templated, routine. Plan, complete tasks and do the mundane, but even in those do them meaningfully and wholeheartedly.
Relationships
It is our relationships that make or break us. Prioritising seeing friends and family even when work is busy or you feel stressed will make a massive difference to your stress levels themselves. Prioritise those relationships that nurture you rather than feeling you have to see those who don’t. It is amazing the difference spending an hour with someone who really cares about you can have on your mental health and perspective.
Variety
Life can get very “samey”, especially as we get older. The danger is that the same old routine, or the same old places and same old things we do can make us feel like we are stuck on a treadmill. Prioritise doing one new thing per month, even if it is small – it can make you shift your energy from feeling quite stuck to something much more dynamic.
You
If you are someone who runs around supporting everyone else but leaves no time for yourself or what you need to stay well, you are going to get burned out. You are just as important as everyone else, and every other thing you think is a priority in life. Nothing in your life will work well or be joyful or sustainable unless you take care of yourself. What is taking care of yourself? Well, this can look very different to different people, but ultimately just recognising that you need to do it is the most important step for you to take today. It is from this that everything flows.
